Where Can I Find Hope?

This week, I have found out I may be Irish, but luck is certainly not on my side. I have always prided myself on my ability to look past adversity and see the greener side of the grass, but this week the grass looked brown and dead. The beginning of the week started simple. Baseball scrimmages were getting close to being done and I wasn't doing that bad but I still had some stuff to prove before the offseason. My grades were all about average and with some questionable grades, I knew I had to turn it around this past week. Then on Sunday night, shit hit the fan. My ex-girlfriend calls me and tells me that Jon had killed himself at the soccer field and I was up all night having phone calls and information being relayed. The next few days, I tried to appreciate the little things in life just a little more because of what had happened. Then, Wednesday rolls around and it's time for flag football. I go to our flag football game and in a matter of 10 minutes of play, I make an awkward spin on the sideline and twist my knee. As I laid there on the turf and looked up at the sky, I honestly thought, "Jon you can see everything." I have always feared the day since I was a little kid that I would tear my ACL. Having bad knees, I figured it would happen one day, but because I have never sat a game out due to injury in my ENITRE career, I couldn't believe that it was actually happening to me. How would I recover? Would I get to play again? What would life be like? So after the game was over and tears subsided, I would stay at home the next 2 days and be cooped up in my house the whole time. Then, after I had some time to reflect on my injury and how to combat it, I come to ONU for the homecoming game. As I am in the middle of a big play being recorded on snapchat, my phone dies and I can't live tweet the game. A little kid hit my knee at the game and I almost cried (I know, what a girl). And to put the cherry on top, my Steelers played on Sunday and Ben Roethlisberger tears his MCL and will be out 4-6 weeks. So after this shitty weekend, you have to wonder, "Casey, are you just trying to make me feel bad"? The answer is no, but I want to share that no matter how bad your day is, or your week is, or etc., the sun will come up tomorrow and the world will go on without you. The world is going on without Jon and I hate to say that, but it is true. So I have the thought, what would the world care if I was gone? In a span of seven days, I managed to loose one of my friends, tear my ACL and have my grades suffer a significant dent. All of this adversity that has reached a new magnitude seems all too much for me, but the only way to find out is to live through it. A quote I came across after hurting my knee really gave me some inspiration. It comes from the bible in Romans 8:18, "The pain you are feeling now cannot compare to the joy that will come." I contemplated just giving up because it seemed so bleak, but when I thought about that quote, I don't want to miss the joys that await me in the future. This post may not be in AP style or appropriate for class, but this post is coming 100 percent from my heart and soul and it is a way for my to vent my feelings and thoughts. That is what I feel what blogging is meant for. To let people voice their opinions, feelings and thoughts and whoever wants to weigh in on the post or share their feelings is free to do so. After this awful week, I can only pray that a good one in store for me soon.